Mountain Men, raspberry pastries, and bears oh my
October 9, 2009 | Filed under: Stuff
Went on a hike today and ran into Charles. Charles is probably sixty-five but maybe eighty-five. It’s hard to tell, but he is a mountain man at heart, faithfully walking the trails every day. And every day, no matter what trail I’m on, or which direction I’m going in, I run across him.
Huh.
Maybe he’s king of the mountain, I don’t know. I know nothing about him other than he knows my name and always stops to pet Ashes. Normally, our conversation is “hi, how are you, fine, thanks.”
Today it started out the same.
Me:
Hey, Charles. How are you?
Charles:
I had a bear.
Me:
(I think I blinked. Did he mean he … ate a bear?) Um, what?
(Yep, that’s me, master communicator.)
Charles:
Went to the store yesterday and bought raspberry pastries. Four of ‘em. My favorite. Went on a walk and came back and there was a bear sitting on my kitchen floor eating the damn pastries. Bastard.
Me:
But you live only four houses down from me.
Charles:
Yep. I don’t recommend you buy any raspberry pastries.
(It’s a good thing it wasn’t cookies. Raspberry pastries are amazing but I can give them up. I’m not sure how I would give up cookies …)
Posted by Jill @ 1:00 am | Make a Comment
ev says:
I live in a small city in upstate NY. We had one in our backyard a couple of years ago. Very scary.
Posted on October 9th, 2009 at 2:08 amJudy F says:
I don’t think I could handle running into a bear. Yikes
Posted on October 9th, 2009 at 2:44 amStacy ~ says:
I grew up in northern Minnesota on 12 acres of land, and we saw bears quite frequently. Once me & my mom walked across the road to get the mail and saw a bear not far from where we were. Common occurrence. Still wouldn’t want to come face to face with one though.
Raspberry pastries, yum! Damn bear LOL.
Posted on October 9th, 2009 at 3:12 amAshley says:
I can’t even imagine coming home to a bear in my kitchen. I’m not sure I’d live to tell about it if it ever happened.
Posted on October 9th, 2009 at 7:01 amDiane W says:
Don’t leave me hanging! How did he get the bear out of his kitchen?!?
Posted on October 9th, 2009 at 7:25 amshannon says:
I’m not sure but I think I would move or maybe invest in a bear proof pastry safe.
Posted on October 9th, 2009 at 7:31 amAllie says:
I also want to know how he got the bear out of his kitchen. Be sure and ask him next time. Tell him we all want to know…
Posted on October 9th, 2009 at 8:00 amCrystal says:
Seriously . . . how did the pastry-deprived man get the bear out his kitchen? And just as important, did he go back to the store for more pastries?
Posted on October 9th, 2009 at 9:11 amJill Shalvis says:
When Charles stepped into his kitchen, he yelled “BAD BEAR” and the bear ran back out the screen door he’d ripped to get in.
Hand to heaven. “Bad bear” worked.
Wonder if it works on bad husbands?
Posted on October 9th, 2009 at 9:21 ambonita says:
you mean he sent the bear back to the woods for a time out?
Posted on October 9th, 2009 at 10:20 amawsum
D says:
Bad Bear? I can almost swear it won’t work on husbands..I mean just think of their response. “I’ll show you how bad I can be” (at least that’s what mine would say).
Posted on October 9th, 2009 at 10:50 amBrandy says:
Seriously? I hope he at least bought himself some more pastries. *G*
Posted on October 9th, 2009 at 11:47 amlimecello says:
“Bastard” hahaha – so succinct. Lol I… am impressed “bad bear” worked. I can’t imagine how I’d react to seeing a bear anywhere near my house.
Posted on October 9th, 2009 at 12:12 pmCrystal says:
Laughing my butt off – “Bad Bear”. Hey the bear got the pastries. Of course yelling “Smart Bear” probably wouldn’t get the desired result.
Posted on October 9th, 2009 at 2:09 pmDonna M says:
Charles is indeed a Mountain Man. He must have some kind of magic to get the bear to run like that!
By the way, better Charles kitchen than yours!! 
Do you really want Alpha Man running away? What if you needed him?
Enjoy the weekend. It is sunny & beautiful here but not hot! Yea!!
Posted on October 9th, 2009 at 2:12 pmNicole S says:
Well I think I’d run if I saw a bear in my kitchen. Got of few laughs from “Bad Bear”.
Posted on October 9th, 2009 at 4:30 pmLiza says:
Note to self, never buy raspberry pasties if I will be anywhere near bears. Thanks for the information.
Posted on October 9th, 2009 at 8:21 pmAmy M says:
I am scared of lady bugs…I would have a stroke if I came upon a bear.
Posted on October 10th, 2009 at 9:19 amKaily Hart says:
I don’t know Jill. If I was you, I’d be more worried about the guy who seems to be tracking my every move…
Posted on October 10th, 2009 at 3:43 pmDee says:
If I saw a bear sitting on my kitchen floor, it would definitely be a DEPENDS moment.
Y’all, time is running out to win an autographed copy of Jill’s book Double Play, and other fabulous prizes, over on my blog The Crab Chronicles!! Come donate to a great cause and YOU could WIN!
Posted on October 10th, 2009 at 3:48 pm