Heart Patient, take three
January 24, 2008 | Filed under: Stuff
You all remember Heart Patient, aka my middle teenager daughter. After the heart problems we went through with her heart bigeminy rhythm last year, things have been downright calm.
Deceptively calm.
This is the daughter who has a tendency to end up in stitches or casts, so I should have known after several months of quiet, things were bound to get crazy again. Cue up last Friday, and the text I get from her at school:
Mom, my chest hurts.
This, of course, makes MY chest hurt and my heart stop. I called Alpha Man. As the master of emergencies (which he learned behind the wheel of an ambulance) he’s the one to go to when freaking out, and he didn’t fail me this time. He managed to understand me through my panic and we picked up Heart Patient together. But luckily, after another battery of tests that the daughter is getting VERY good at, not to mention a million dollars later on our part (don’t EVEN get me started on insurance companies, the assholes – yes, I said assholes when I really wanted to say f*ckers, please admire my restraint, won’t you?), we have discovered the latest problem.
Middle pulled her chest wall muscle playing basketball. This is actually an extremely painful condition that can feel like a heart attack. The doctor prescribed some pain reliever and told her to rest.
Ha! Who is he kidding? Middle has two speeds – full bore ahead, or fast asleep. No “rest” setting, no sitting still allowed. So all sympathies on this condition should be sent directly to me, thank you very much, because it will be me suffering while trying to keep her “resting” mode.
Of course if you really feel sorry for me, you could send cookies. Any kind will do, any kind at all.
Posted by Jill @ 1:00 am | Make a Comment
A-ha » Heart Patient, take three says:
[...] Here’s another interesting post I read today by Author Jill Shalvis [...]
Posted on January 24th, 2008 at 3:28 amJudy F says:
ah sending you all hugs. I have a niece that is like that goes all out 24/7 I hope you all get through this too. Will have to find some healing cookies.
HUGS>>>>>
Posted on January 24th, 2008 at 3:53 amThe Hunter's Wife says:
I just found your site. I will have to checkout your books. Nothing like a great book.
If I baked, I would send cookies.
Posted on January 24th, 2008 at 5:05 amBayou Woman says:
Cookies on the fast train to Tahoe. What’s your, I mean your daughter’s favorite?!! She can nibble while she sits peacefully in front of the TV or while playing video game basketball! Hey—try that!
Posted on January 24th, 2008 at 5:42 amBW
naomi says:
Phew, at least it’s not a heart attack. And dayum, you poor girl! *looks around house for cookies. cupboard is sadly bare*
I guess I need to either get my butt in gear and make some cookies to send you, or have the Girl Scouts drop by your house ASAP. Cookie therapy is definitely going to see you through middle’s recovery.
Posted on January 24th, 2008 at 6:31 amWendy says:
I say you buy her a bunch of books, a pack of water bottles, tons of cookies (for you, too!) and lock her in her room!
That would be very awesome – I wish my parents would do to me!
Posted on January 24th, 2008 at 6:32 amAndey says:
Kids. Can’t live with them, can’t beat them nearly as much as they deserve. (Says the woman whose kids think they’re abused when they’re denied videogames.)
I’m sorry middle hurts, but oh thank heavens it’s something that will mend without further intervention.
And kudos to Jill on her restraint. The insurance industry is dominated by nasty asshats.
Posted on January 24th, 2008 at 6:55 amElizabeth K says:
Have you counted your new gray hairs yet?
Posted on January 24th, 2008 at 7:08 amDee says:
I have an 11 year old boy who used to only have two speeds. Now he has three – asleep, going full tilt, and Gameboy mode. The final one allows me to sometimes actually READ!Sometimes I can even WRITE, praise God!
Hang in there!
Posted on January 24th, 2008 at 7:10 amDee
Bailey Stewart says:
I’d make you cookies, but you and I both know I’d eat them …
Sorry (((Jill)))
Posted on January 24th, 2008 at 7:10 amAsthmagirl says:
I know what you mean about the middle. I got up this morning and my middle had stayed up all night because she was wired about her nursing test. No worries though, she’ll sleep this afternoon when she gets home from class!
Posted on January 24th, 2008 at 7:16 amI baked last night, but apparently not a big enough batch as there’s only two left this morning. I’m going to have to bake a double if I want to send you any!
Liza says:
Glad she is doing ok. I have a niece that runs the same way, and the only time she isn’t full speed is when she is sick or asleep. I know that cookies will fix just about anything…need to see if I have any at my house. Girl Scount cookies come in soon.
Posted on January 24th, 2008 at 7:17 amLaurie says:
Thank goodness it wasn’t anything more serious.
We’ll see about those cookies – it’s cold and snowy here, my favorite time to be in the kitchen baking!
Hugs on doing the insurance company shuffle.
Posted on January 24th, 2008 at 8:23 amAllie says:
Jill, I feel for you! Middle’s energy level sounds a lot like that of my border collies’.
Good luck with the “rest.” You’ll probably have to duct tape her to the couch. 
Posted on January 24th, 2008 at 9:43 amCourtney says:
(((Jill))) and (((Middle))). Thank God Middle’s okay.
Posted on January 24th, 2008 at 10:27 amBrandy says:
Hugs to you and Middle. Goodness! I’d send cookies but I just peanut butter cookies and there’s only one left!
Posted on January 24th, 2008 at 10:34 amPat L. says:
Glad that it was not anything serious. Hope the pain is easing up. Nothing worse than having a sick kid or child with an illness or condition.
Posted on January 24th, 2008 at 11:30 amAlice Audrey says:
Here, have some thin-mints. I ordered extra.
Posted on January 24th, 2008 at 12:42 pmCryna says:
Jill so glad that it was not as serious as first thought. Good luck on keeping her in rest mode, that is going to be hard. I would send you cookies – but they have these funny border restrictions…….sorry
Posted on January 24th, 2008 at 2:32 pmJulie Leto says:
Jill, you do know that it’s Preorder time for Girl Scout Cookies, right? If you need a fix and don’t mind waiting for me to ship them (they’ll arrive some time next month) then drop me a line!
Hugs on your middle girl…made my chest hurt just to read it. My husband had that condition once too and it was terrifying. I’m glad, at least, that it was what it was and nothing worse!
Posted on January 24th, 2008 at 3:58 pmJudy F says:
Maybe I better call my niece and put in an extra Shalvis order. What are your favorite???
Posted on January 24th, 2008 at 4:40 pmDonna M says:
Hugs to you & the family Jill. I’m glad that middle daughter is okay. That must have been a frightening experience with her heart history.
I wished I lived close enough to bring you homemade cookies cause I love to bake especially with all this wintery, cold weather we are having.
This morning I finished reading Strong & Sexy. Great job, I loved it. We have to wait how long for Brody & Maddie’s story? June, seems way to far away at the moment!
To all that visit here, if you haven’t picked up a copy of Strong & Sexy yet don’t wait, buy or order soon because you don’t want to miss this one. :thumbsup:
Posted on January 24th, 2008 at 5:57 pmDru says:
Hugs to middle daughter and bear hugs to you.
Posted on January 24th, 2008 at 6:26 pmJSL says:
Jill, I’m so glad everything is OK. I’d say if I had cookies I’d send them to you :-X but I’d probably eat them all.
And, this is how I know I’m not ready to be a parent (a good thing) – after I read this post, my first thought was “drug her.” 
*angelface*
Posted on January 24th, 2008 at 8:50 pmjeanne says:
So glad it wasn’t something worse but I know you must be worrying. I just sent in my first order yesterday for girl scout cookies. I’m sure there’ll be more!
Posted on January 24th, 2008 at 9:20 pmDarlene says:
Oh my goodness….I’ll make a double batch of chocolate chip (the only kind I know how to make lol) cookies just for you.
Posted on January 24th, 2008 at 9:29 pmStacy ~ says:
Yeah, after that scare, it sounds like you need a whole boatload of cookies. Hugs to you JIll.
Posted on January 25th, 2008 at 4:22 amDevon Ellington says:
I’m glad she’s okay, sweetie, how scary.
Re: Insurance companies. One of my first temp jobs as a teen was for an insurance company. Taped over everyone’s desk was this: “Always say no the first time”.
They were instructed to refused EVERY claim without reading it the first time. 75% of the people told “no” the first time never fight it. They didn’t even read the claim to find out if it was legitimate until the second or sometimes the third time.
I lost my insurance at the beginning of the year, even though I’m in a union, which is a little scary, but last year, even with insurance, I had to pay for everything out of pocket because no one within an hour’s drive would accept the type of insurance our union forced us to have.
Health care in this country is non-existent unless you’re rich.
Posted on January 25th, 2008 at 7:20 amCassie says:
Hugs to all of you.
Love “Get a Clue”
Posted on January 25th, 2008 at 8:14 amCaryn says:
I’m so glad it wasn’t very serious, as painful as it may be. I had open-heart surgery when I was a baby (had two holes in my heart) so we had similar stresses while I was growing up. I hope she’s okay.
Posted on January 25th, 2008 at 4:56 pmDeb says:
Oh man. I did that to myself when I was seventeen. I was lifting a drill team prop of all the stupid things. I hurts. It really, really hurts. Poor baby. Get better.
Posted on January 31st, 2008 at 9:16 pm2db74040f38c says:
2db74040f38c…
2db74040f38c8847130e…
Posted on May 10th, 2008 at 4:53 amJL says:
Now that you’re, y’know, five months after the fact, I can safely say I feel Middle’s pain. Because I did that to myself two weeks ago.
How, you ask?
I’m so glad you did.
I sneezed.
That’s it. And apparently I was sitting or standing in just the right way when I sneezed, and I entered a whole new world of pain. (I do not recommend trying to sing after inflicting such an injury on oneself.) My father said I was not “too young” for The Big One (gee, thanks, Dad), which I countered with saying it was on the wrong side of my chest. The rash of sneezes was Friday; I was visiting the walk-in clinic at my doctor’s on Monday morning. My mother demanded to know if I’d told my doctor that I’d spent a week and a half caring for her, when she had a staph infection in her lungs. (I didn’t. She’d been on antibiotics for three days when I got out there to care for her, and was in the hospital two days more before I was around her enough to catch anything.) A week on vicoprofen, and I felt much better. And I slept a lot. But it was nearly a week before breathing didn’t hurt, and it took a week and a half before I could sleep without half a dozen pillows propping me up. (Even then, I still needed four for a couple more days.)
Yeah, wish I could say I pulled my chest wall muscle (do you have any idea how hard it is to get heat to that kind of muscle pain? there are things in the way!) by playing basketball. People gave me funny looks when I told them I sneezed.
Posted on May 17th, 2008 at 12:25 pm