So normally in this house I’m the I Love Lucy. I lose things. I lock myself out. I forget things. I get lost.
And Alpha Man finds my stuff, saves me, unforgets everything I forget, and paints lines on trees so I can find my way home.
Until a week ago.
A week ago Alpha Man lost his iPad. Except he insisted it had been stolen. Even though I have him on my Find My Friends app, which showed his dot in this house. So I kept telling him he’d lost his iPad somewhere in the house or the car.
He said I was full of it. And also that the app “was wrong”.
He is, after all, called Alpha Man for a reason, and that reason is largely stubbornness.
ANYWAY, days go by. His dot remains. I make him search the house and the car and the truck. Three times. Nothing. So I finally felt sorry for him because he was missing playing Candy Crush and maybe a little bit driving me crazy and I also searched the house and the car and the truck. No go. I actually started to believe maybe he was right. Maybe the iPad was stolen by aliens who float above our house and play Candy Crush with his iPad…
Then Oldest and The Boy came home for the weekend. And Alpha Man went into the My iPad Was Stolen speech, and while he was right in the middle of it, Oldest Facetime’d his iPad.
And … someone answered. Oldest started screaming “the perp is in the house, the perp is in the house!!!!” while we all stared down at her phone screen, waiting for Facetime to reveal the perp, which turned out to be …
Her boyfriend. He’d gone on a hunt for the iPad and had found it in the vehicle. In like two seconds.
I’m so happy. I’m no longer the only I Love Lucy in the house!!!!! But don’t tell that to Alpha Man. He’s still pretty sure it was stolen and he was somehow set up…